Angel Kisses
by laconic edge
Summary: In where Colette proves that she has ignorance made of steel. Zelos should've known better. One-shot.


Sheena had labeled it "divine retribution." Honestly, Zelos thought _that_ was a little uncalled for. Since when did a cold count as punishment for complimenting a few of his gorgeous hunnies? And weren't celestial beings supposed to be above human faults anyway? If there was a goddess floating out there, he'd think such a heavenly beauty wouldn't be petty enough to smack him with a virus just because he vocally appreciated the female body.

Not that he actually believed or anything. No, that ship had already sailed. It just helped to have something to blame.

Another snotty sneeze erupted, apparently the signal his waning headache needed in order to come back full force, and Zelos groaned pitifully into his pillow. Ugh, dear Goddess. His head hurt, his nose wouldn't stop running, and he just felt particularly not cool right now. He didn't even care if anyone heard him moan like a five-year-old; maybe then he'd get some sympathy here. From who, he didn't know yet, seeing as he'd been abandoned by his so-called companions and all.

Sheena and the brat in particular were taking a little too much glee in watching him suffer, so he'd rather suck it up alone than invite them in; Raine's healing arts were meant for mental and physical sicknesses, not a common illness, which meant he'd automatically lose all sympathy points if he so much as pouted in her direction; cute little Presea and Regal had both given him flat condolences before leaving him to wallow in bed; Colette… well, actually he hadn't seen his little angel lately. So that left his favorite bud, Lloyd, promising to bring him some of his dad's famous Dwarven Stew… which, according to Genis, would either clear his system or turn half of his intestines into gelatin. Lloyd obviously hadn't been paying attention when Zelos quickly said he'd pass on the stew.

He sneezed again, so loud that his head started to ring. Man, this _had_ to be some type of sick, cosmic joke. Heroes trying to save the worlds from imploding on themselves deserved a free pass from all common colds.

…Heh, never mind the creditability of that statement.

Thankfully, a light, timid knock on the door dispelled the beginnings of his increasingly pessimistic thoughts, and Zelos struggled through his covers to sit up. _Finally_. "Yeah, it's open." Well, it definitely wasn't Lloyd; that guy wouldn't know manners if he tripped over them. So unless his wonderful Professor Raine had decided to lighten up and try a Healing Circle on him…

The door cracked open, and a head of blond bangs poked through. "Zelos?" Seeing he was indeed awake, Colette slipped through and closed the door behind her, though she continued to hang uncertainly by the corner. "I'm sorry if I woke you," she whispered.

"Like I'd turn down a visit from my cute little angel." It was kinda hard to stay charming when all he wanted to do was blow his nose, but Zelos liked to think he pulled it off. "I can't sleep with all this racket I'm making anyway. Feel free to keep me company." At least he knew Colette would properly coo over his wailing immune system.

That seemed to satisfy her. She relaxed her stance and tiptoed her way over to the chair placed strategically near his bedside. It was when she sat down that Zelos finally noticed the two cups in her hands, steam rising enticingly from the tops. His nose started to clog again. "I'm sorry. The professor told me you were sick, so…" She smiled, eyes big and sympathetic, and offered one of the cups. "I thought you might like some tea! It helps a lot with a cold, I think."

A visit and some tea? That's what he liked about Colette. Already his stinging ego seemed to be on the road to recovery. "So they do teach manners back in the booni—eh, in Sylvarant, huh?" Whoops. Almost slipped there. He took a sip to keep his mouth occupied from running off without his brain, and to his surprise ended with a hum of appreciation. Wow, this stuff beat most of the expensive brands Sebastian brought home. Even better was the fact he could breathe through a nostril now.

His reaction must've pleased Colette a lot because she started giggling over the rim of her own cup. "I'm really glad you like it! Grandmother said her great-grandmother came up with the recipe, so it's like a family trade secret. I drank it a lot when I was younger." Her fingers began to drum lightly against the mug, blue eyes clouding with fond recollection. "Maybe I'll get a chance to pass it down if I have kids."

Zelos snorted and muttered in amusement, "Really. With who?" Oh, he could think of a few candidates – and by candidates, he meant Lloyd. Already he felt sorry for their offspring. They'd either be eccentric geniuses for that bit of irony or classic country bumpkins.

Colette nearly choked on her tea. Oh, he'd said that out loud, hadn't he? "W-who?" she squeaked.

Well, it wouldn't do him any good to chase off the one person willing to deal with his sniffing, so he backtracked and slightly switched topics. "No need to be embarrassed, my little angel. You've already got the makings of a wonderful mother." And a great wife, but he suspected her face would explode if he mentioned that part. He would have chuckled further at her expense, but his nose chose that moment to start running again. Crap. And he'd already gone through the last box of tissues. What kind of hotel was th—

"Oh!" Before he could finish that thought, a fresh box magically found its way to his lap. Zelos momentarily entertained the idea of kissing her out of gratitude. "I thought you might want some!" She seemed almost embarrassed by her moment of insight, and laughed sheepishly. "Um, I wasn't sure if you had any…"

He didn't answer right away; he was busy working his way through a fourth of the box, nose finally appeased and now able to breathe properly. He sighed in relief. "Colette-chan, you are amazing. I think I'm falling in love again~" On second thought, maybe her future children stood a chance of survival. He never figured _Colette _of all women to have those natural motherly instincts - then again, she'd been willing to give up her life to save a rather ungrateful world - but between the tea and the tissues, he was sold on the idea.

"Is there anything else I can do?" She watched and fretted, and Zelos wryly took note of how she completely ignored his last comment. Sheena really needed to stop training her like that. "I don't like seeing you so unhappy."

"Oh, don't worry about me." He winked in her direction. "A measly cold isn't anything the Great Zelos can't ha--" Okay, maybe he'd have to rethink that statement. If his nose didn't kill him first, hacking his lungs out would get the job done. What a sad way to go.

A cool hand on his forehead distracted him from his woe. Zelos blinked owlishly; wow, she really was good at this mother stuff. After a moment, Colette pulled it back, chewing her lip in worry. "You're hot…"

"Never expected to hear that phrase out of _your_ mouth, honey." The curious tilt of her head and the silence that followed told Zelos he really needed to quit while he was ahead. Colette's innocence had to be made of double-plated iron. "Never mind." He sighed and settled himself back against the pillows, letting some warmth from the cup seep into his hands. "Give me a few days and I'll pull through." He didn't feel like playing up the sympathy card much anymore, now that he had someone more than willing to take care of him. You had to have a black hole for a heart to keep leading someone like Colette on.

"I know… but still. Is there anything at all?" Typical Colette. She didn't seem willing to leave until Zelos gave her an answer. Alright then.

"An angel kiss." It was the first thing that came to mind, admittedly a bad idea, but chances were his little hunny would blush herself the color of a tomato and use some excuse to remove herself.

So he couldn't help but stare when Colette did neither, instead giving Zelos an honest look of curiosity. "An… angel kiss?" She blinked, mouth forming an 'o' of surprise. "Oh! They have healing properties?"

… She couldn't be— "… Hehe, yep. Didn't you know? One kiss from an angel will cure any sickness."

Zelos suddenly agreed with all of Sheena's accusations about him being the scum of the human race, but damn, he was _sick_ and Colette had made the mistake of taking him seriously.

"Oh…" The girl took a moment to soak up this information, mouth turned down in a frown of concentration and debate. He actually wanted to see what she'd do now. "Well…" Now the blush came, a slight dusting across her face as she took a look at Zelos, then down at her cup, then back up at him, eyes shyly searching his face. "I don't know if I really qualify as a real angel, but you'll feel better, right?"

Dear Martel, he couldn't do this to her. His hand slapped to his forehead as he laughed, laughed _hard_, eyes screwed shut and lungs hurting. Oh man, he'd be feeling this in a moment, but for now he didn't care. Leave it to Colette to offer him a kiss so he'd feel better. "You are quite a woman, you know that?" He took the time wipe a tear from his eye. Fhew. That had felt good. "And while I'd appreciate any kisses from my little angel, I'll manage." Sheena, Lloyd, Raine, and Genis alone would destroy him if he took advantage of her innocence. Plus he could never sink so low as to steal a kiss from someone he genuinely liked. No matter what Sheena said, he actually had standards.

But as the next second proved, to his utter shock, Colette had no qualms about sacrificing her lip-locking virginity if it meant he would be 'cured'. It lasted seven seconds – that one part of his brain that hadn't gone into immediate shutdown was busy counting them off – a kiss made more of awkward noses pressing together than of actual lips, an obvious 'first' for the person who'd initiated, and he'd never actually said he'd been lying, had he? Well, this suddenly made a lot of sense. And if he'd been curious before, he _definitely_ knew he wasn't making it into any type of heaven now.

About five seconds into it, the door opened.

"Hey, Zelos, I brought you so—C-COLETTE!" The bowl of questionable Dwarven Stew met an untimely end on the ground, splashed all over the floor in patterns his blood would soon be mimicking in a minute. And he still couldn't do much more than flap his mouth uselessly as his brain tried to get past the fact that sweet, innocent little Colette had just kissed h--

"Huh?" Oh Martel, no. "Geez, Lloyd, I could hear you all the way across the ha—" The room went dead silent. Zelos saw his life flash before his eyes. And then, "ZELOS, YOU _PIG_. WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER?" Scratch that about his blood spilling on the floor. It would be painted on the walls by the time this ended.

Colette flinched at the yelling, and chose then to start explaining the situation before the room erupted into flames. "I-it's nothing, you guys!" She stood up, flushed the color of Lloyd's shirt, and not sure if she should stay by Zelos' side in case he needed protection. "Zelos said an angel kiss would cure his cold, so--"

Zelos let out a pitiful sob as his fate was sealed, and Sheena didn't wait for Colette to finish that sentence. In what would later be described as an unearthly howl that stretched across all of Flanoir, a furious banshee distributed her "divine retribution" before a confused swordsman – "Kisses can really _do_ that?" – and a frightened angel – "S-sheena, he's still sick! Please stop! The kiss hasn't worked yet!"

---------------

From underneath a pile of blankets, Colette poked her small head out, eyes teared up and full of guilty sorrow. Not surprisingly, she still somehow managed to look just a degree below too adorable. "I'm really sorry," she moaned, and then sneezed pitifully.

Zelos handed over the box of tissues from the day before, which the girl took gratefully. "My dear, what are you talking about?" he smirked at her. "I'd say your kiss worked pretty well." Not a sniff to be heard from him. He could breathe through both nostrils at the same time, and his fever had gone down, too. So long as he could manage a few days with severely bruised ribs – his cold beauty had flatly stated he'd get a Healing Circle after he thought twice about leading Colette on – he'd be good as new.

"But I'm the reason Sheena…"

"You know our favorite banshee would have beaten me for something else," he explained patiently. Colette didn't have a refute for that, so instead sniffed and coughed. "I'm sure I've got another one due for getting you sick."

"N-no, that wasn't your fault! I was the one who… um." Apparently, she still couldn't manage to utter the actual deed, and thus settled on burrowing deeper into the covers. "That was my first one, too…"

Oh, great. Now _he_ felt guilty. "Hey, don't sweat it." He ruffled some of her bangs in a rare display of affection, a move that surprised them both. "It doesn't count if it's an angel kiss. You can still save your first real one for that special guy." At the very least, that got her to smile meekly back, even if she now knew angel kisses didn't exist. Too bad the Professor had taken her aside to properly explain the innuendo. Zelos had been wondering how long Colette could keep living in blissful ignorance. A year? Maybe two? A lifetime? It could be that story she shared with her kids, another family secret passed down from generation to generation.

He didn't realize Colette was speaking to him until she reached over and lightly touched his arm. "Huh?"

"Um…" With her face already a little pink from illness, he couldn't be sure if she was blushing or just running the same fever he had. "I'm… just really glad you're feeling better. Even if that's not really what did it…" she paused, and then smiled brightly at him, still plenty embarrassed but oddly happy as well. "I'm glad I tried to help."

Zelos stared at that smile. For not the first time, he swore his heart got stuck somewhere in his throat. There was a mental fumble for a good line to use, but he failed when nothing came to mind, and so finally settled on giving her a slight, crooked smile of gratitude.

He didn't care what anyone said. Colette's kisses worked miracles.

* * *

**A/N**: I've had this idea for the longest, longest time, and while it didn't come out quite like I imagined it, I still like it as a whole. Because seriously, I could so see this happening.

Apologies if I fucked up Zelos too much. I was tempted to go for Colette's perspective, but decided I won't improve unless I give him a shot. So... yep. Also, I realized too late that Zelos could've just healed his bruised ribs himself, but alas, lazy writer is lazy right now. :x

Please read and review! Any crit is greatly appreciated.


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